How to get what you want in your life? You get to choose what to FOCUS on.

What do want to achieve in your life? What are your life goals? What are your outcomes? The answers to these questions and thinking about them enable you to better find your life values and true desires which we talked about them here. However, do you think it is enough to just figure out your outcomes, sit down tight and wish for them to come true?! Of course not! Finding your outcomes is just the first step which, by the way, is one of the most important steps (if not the most important one) in your life. As we see, the majority of people are just wandering around aimlessly to deal with their to-do lists. We’ve already covered the topic of managing your daily challenges and workloads, and there we talked about the importance of prioritizing your to-do lists based on your values. However, worrying and obsessing about your to-do lists without putting your main focus on your priorities and outcomes could easily overwhelm you and suck up all of your energy. That is the reason, we talked about not doing a couple of tasks at the same time in the article about decision making and taking actions.

How do you define focus? I would say focus is the level of your obsession for something important to you. How bad do you want to achieve your outcomes? How big are your WHYs (reasons) for achieving them? Are you willing to give most of your time and energy for accomplishing them? If you have a big WHY that why you want to achieve something in your life, you will probably put most of your energy & time on that to get there. You’ll be motivated to get there because your WHYs (reasons) for getting there are big, and you’ll link pleasure to getting there and pain to the opposite of that. Let’s take the example of having big WHYs on a couple of things and focusing on them at the same time. In that case, you’ll probably be there and achieve them, but as obvious as is, it takes longer to get where you want to be. Because you are distributing your main focus, time and energy over a couple of things which they might all be equally important to you. I am not saying anything here, I just want you to know that the ways to proceed and lead your life by your focus is all up to you.

As you may have realized, you get to choose what to focus on in any second of your life. What’s wrong is always available so as what’s right. There are always two sides to focus on in any second of your life. You could always focus on the negative side of the things in your days, or you could choose to focus on the positive side of your days. As I’ve already mentioned “Life is nothing but our own interpretations of it.”. So, our focus is the core element which determines how we feel and what we get in the end. On top of that, focusing on the big pictures and final outcomes could easily rescue us from drowning down by daily distractions.

I’ll give you an example, how important would be answering to your emails and paying the bills when you start to picture your final outcome such as living on a beautiful island next to a see and having fun with your loved ones? How happy and energized will you be visualizing those pictures in your mind? How small would be your daily to-do lists then? Would still let worthless stuff to steal your focus and joy?

All of the successful people that you see, they have been able to constantly focus on their outcomes. They didn’t let the worthless distractions take their most precious asset which is their focus (you could also call it, your time and energy). 

Think big and don’t settle for less than you deserve. In any case during the day when you realized that you’ve been stuck in your daily to-do lists and distractions, take a couple of deep breaths and remember your final outcomes. That makes you to either build a connection between these little stuff with your outcomes or to get rid of them (if they are not helping you to get your outcomes). I promise you that anytime you do this, you see how your daily distractions would shrink and become small compared to your long-term visions. So, you won’t be distracted, angry or frustrated over worthless stuff anymore. In a simple sentence, your reality is shaped based on your constant focus.